Drug Test: Beat any drug test FREE

By Christopher Rice

This article is here to help perfectly nice, hardworking people get around a system that is unfair, because if an employer can't tell from your performance that you've been high, then private habits should have zero relevance to your employability.

1.) Drink water. Drink lots and lots and lots of water—gallons of it—from the time you learn about your test up until the big moment. While you can't realistically detoxify your body of all signs of marijuana use in a short period of time, you can temporarily do so, in your urine anyway, by flushing your system. Water is your best bet, best weapon, and best friend when it comes to passing a piss test. However, it's dangerous (people have died from water intoxication) and risky because colorless urine arouses suspicion, possibly flagging the sample.

2.) Don't bother with commercial urine cleansers. You might see them advertised in High Times or other places around the internet, but there is no real scientific evidence that urine cleansers are effective. They can be pricy (ranging from $20 - $50), mostly because they're preying on people who are freaking out about possibly losing their jobs. But if you read the ingredients, they usually contain herbal diuretics like goldenseal, that can easily be purchased at the drug store for half the cash (and it won't even work anyhow).

Related: Underground America is back online. How to beat the police, CPS, DEA, FBI, IRS and NSA. How to beat any drug test, police sting and how to beat your court case and more.

3.) Take Midol. You can increase your pee flow by taking diuretics. Coffee and cranberry juice can be a little too weak, and you want to stay away from diet pills (which are also diuretics) because there's always a chance that you could actually test positive for some kind of amphetamine. Some folks suggest taking 80 milligrams of the prescription drug Lasix (used to treat high blood pressure), but good luck getting your hands on that. Stick with PMS medication used to treat bloating, like Midol. It's safer and readily available.

4.) Take aspirin. Studies indicate that aspirin interferes with EMIT drug screening, masking certain parts of the spectrum that urine testing checks. Take 4 aspirin 4-6 hours before your test.

Aspirin taken before test covers THC by creating a false negative. This only works under ideal circumstances and only for the EMIT test and not a gc/ms.

5.) Take a B-complex multivitamin. Between drinking all the fluids and taking the diuretics, your urine will probably be pretty watered down and almost clear. This can raise suspicions for some lab technicians. B2 or B12 can help to bring back that yellow glow, so take 100 milligrams of a B-complex multivitamin two hours before your test.

Related article: Drug Test 101: Know your rights

6.) Timing is everything. You'll want to give your best (cleanest) sample of urine—time of day and time of stream play into your success with this. You'll want to pee at least twice before your test. (You're first pee of the day tends to be the "dirtiest.") When you're actually conducting catch your urine in the cup midstream.

7.) Avoid spiking or masking the urine sample. This is a method used to throw off testing equipment from seeing certain results. Commercial and OTC chemicals containing nitrates were once used to mask THC but are now commonly tested for. These products are all detectable, and will result in a failed drug screen.

Adding bleach to nullify sample will change the pH and flag the sample as being tampered and you will fail. Drinking bleach will blind you and maybe kill you.

Related: Underground America is back online. How to beat the police, CPS, DEA, FBI, IRS and NSA. How to beat any drug test, police sting and how to beat your court case and more.

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8.) Substitute the sample. Substitution is a method that involves substituting your urine with that of another person's or a synthetic sample.
  • Synthetic urine comes in two basic forms: the liquid type found in smoke shops that is similar to what is used to calibrate lab equipment; or vials of a powdered concentrate that can be added to a few ounces of warm water.
  •  Both are kept in a delivery devise with a temperature meter. This method works on every employment urine test (provided some conditions are met such as controlling the temperature (92 -100) and delivering the sample in 4 minutes or less). Some labs are now testing for synthetic urine by looking for uric acid. If you're located in Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, West Virginia, California, Ohio, Colorado, and Canada make sure your synthetic urine contains uric acid.
  • Guarantee the substitute stays at body temperature if you using something that keeps it concealed under your clothing and close to your skin. A liquid crystal thermometer with 2 degree offset like the ones used on the collection cups is ideal and a properly sized organic warmer as an insulating source as it is the body that is the regulator.
  • Some labs are now testing for synthetic urine. For your legal protection, it is critical that you do not use this method for any government tests including military, civil service, and especially probation.
  • The liquid premixed urine has a couple of drawbacks as it doesn't have a head or small layer of bubbles on the surface and it has no smell.
  • Powdered synthetic urine does. Many labs and collection sites will reject your specimen if they suspect it is synthetic and ask you to urinate under direct observation.
  • You can substitute someone else's urine. You will want to test it with a reagent panel strip available at Walgreens. Collect the urine fresh and keep it in a sealed, refrigerated container, and use within 48Hrs, as urine will darken and bacteria will grow. You can also freeze the urine for longer storage. If deterioration becomes noticeable the lab may suspect something. A UTI or Urinary Tract Infection will be suspected if a micro UA is run as stale urine becomes like ammonia and the pH will change.
Related article: Drug test the President...

Detection in saliva tests begins immediately upon use:
  • Marijuana and hashish (THC): An hour after ingestion, and up to 24 hours depending on use.
  • Cocaine (including crack): From time of ingestion up to 2 to 3 days.
  • Opiates: From time of ingestion up to 2 to 3 days.
  • Methamphetamine and ecstasy (MDMA, "crank," "ice"): From time of ingestion up to 2 to 3 days.
  • Benzodiazepines: From time of ingestion up to 2 to 3 days.
Related article: How long does crystal meth stay in your system?
    If you've used in the past 3 days, your best bet is to avoid collection. When you're instructed to place the collection pad between the lower cheek and gums and gently rub the pad back and forth along the gum line until the pad is moist, you will fake this movement and rub pad on teeth. Once moist, you are supposed to leave collection pad between cheek and gums for a full 2 minutes — again, hold it between your teeth.

If caught by surprise and you need to stall it is better to go to the lab and fail to show your I.D.: refusal will get you fired, but if you misplaced your ID you will have to come back or the sample is invalid.


  1. The Challenge of Dilute Specimens
  2. Urine PH changes
  3. ethnic bias in hair drug testing
  4. http://www.erowid.org/plants/poppy/poppy_testing.shtml
  5. http://www.snopes.com/crime/clever/bleach.asp
  6. Drug abuse Handbook pg. 770
  7. [1]
  8. DOT Collection Procedures
  9. http://www.avitarinc.com/Resources/Drug_Testing_State_Regulations.cfm
  10. http://digitalcommons.pace.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1478&context=lawfaculty

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